25 Funny Responses & Comebacks For Low Ball Offers

Lowballers are challenging to deal with, and they should be your focus so you won’t reduce your profit. 

The best Comebacks For Lowball Offers to win over meagre offers are always made professionally with a bit of humour instead of anger. 

Check out these 26 Funny responses to Lowball Offers on Houses or any property and sell it to no lowballers.

comebacks for low ball offers

25 Funny Responses & Best Comebacks For Low Ball Offers

  1. Is this a negotiation or a stand-up comedy show?
  2. I didn’t realize we were playing, now let’s make a deal.
  3. Did you mistake me for a yard sale?
  4. I’m sorry, my calculator is malfunctioning. It’s showing your offer as a joke.
  5. I appreciate the laugh, but let’s get serious about this offer.
  6. Are you serious or just trying out your comedy routine?
  7. You must have mistaken me for a charity organization.
  8. I’ll consider your offer seriously when it’s not an insult.
  9. Thanks for the offer, but my bills don’t accept discounts.
  10. Are we negotiating, or playing ‘Who Can Low Ball the Most?’
  11. I’d rather keep it than accept an offer that undervalues it.
  12. I appreciate your creativity, but let’s talk real numbers here.
  13. If that’s your offer, I’ll throw in a bridge in Brooklyn for free.
  14. I’m sorry, I don’t speak ‘insultingly low offer.
  15. I’ll consider your offer when it’s not laughable.
  16. I’ll accept your offer when the world stops spinning.
  17. Unfortunately, I can’t sell it for that much
  18. Thanks, but it’s quite a bit below what I’m looking for.
  19. I’ve done my research & this price is not fair
  20. I’m not entertaining offers that are far below the asking price.
  21. That price wouldn’t even cover the materials cost.
  22. Thanks, but I’ll pass.
  23. Sorry, it’s too low.
  24. Are you a window shopper, or serious about buying?
  25. That is no problem. The right buyer will come along eventually.

Negotiation, not stand-up comedy. Let’s make a serious deal.

You are telling the other person about the importance of seriousness in the negotiation process, redirecting the focus away from humour towards a more professional and productive discussion.

Yard sale? This is a negotiation of a house.

You humorously point out the disparity between the context of a house negotiation and the casual reference to a yard sale while highlighting the seriousness of the transaction.

My calculator malfunctioned. Your offer is a joke.

It is a little witty response that suggests disbelief on your face due to the offer’s deficiency by humorously relating it to a malfunctioning calculator, indicating that the offer is far from acceptable on your end.

Thanks for the laugh. Now, a serious offer, please.

You are telling them you appreciate their humour to lighten the mood, but to move forward, we’ll need a more realistic offer since you are open to negotiation, but on numbers that reflect the real value.

Serious offer or a comedy routine? 

You are playfully questioning the nature of their offer before asking about the desired seriousness required for true negotiation of it being perceived as a comedy routine and to reconsider or present a substantial offer.

Charity? This is a business deal.

You just humorously dismissed the notion of charity in the context of a business deal, emphasizing the need for fair and equitable terms in negotiations.

Consider it seriously… when it’s not an insult.

You are humorously challenging the offer’s validity by suggesting that you consider it an insult and implying that serious consideration will only be possible when the offer is improved to a respectable level.

Appreciate the offer, but bills don’t accept discounts.

This response humorously rejects the offer while pointing out the need for a more realistic proposal, likening it to bills’ inability to accept discounts in everyday life. You are indirectly rejecting any discount on it.

Negotiating, or “Who Can Lowball Most?”

This is a humorous question about negotiation, suggesting that it feels more like a competition to see who can offer the lowest price while highlighting the need for a more reasonable and fair approach.

Keep it, then accept an undervalued offer. 

You are suggesting they keep the item rather than accepting an offer that significantly undervalues it, indicating the need for a more reasonable offer.

Appreciate creativity, let’s talk about real numbers.

You are acknowledging the offer’s creativity while steering the conversation toward discussing realistic and feasible numbers so you can practically and properly negotiate the deal rather than wasting time.

Ah Yes, Offer + Brooklyn Bridge (free) for you. 

You are going to say this to a ridiculously low offer, but with humour in a way, that offer is so low that it might as well include a free Brooklyn Bridge as unreasonableness of the proposal.

Don’t say “insultingly low offer.”

You are directly avoiding labelling the offer as “insultingly low” while still conveying the message that it falls far below expectations and encouraging them to reconsider a more reasonable proposal.

Consider when the offer isn’t laughable.

This response suggests that the offer in your papers is laughable and also indicates that you are looking for serious consideration, which will only be given when the offer is improved to a reasonable level.

Accept when the world stops spinning.  

A slightly humorous and a bit tense reply to the offer, which is so unrealistic that it would only be considered when the impossible event of the world stopping spinning occurs, which means it’s never going to happen.

Unfortunately, I can’t sell it for that.  

A polite decline of the offer while indicating that it falls below an acceptable threshold, and you suggest to them a more reasonable offer would be appreciated if they are seriously considering buying.

Thanks, but a bit below what I’m looking for

This is a polite way of saying the offer while indicating that it falls short of the desired price or terms and that you are looking for a higher offer if they want this transaction to be considered.

Research has shown that this price isn’t fair.

In this response, you tell us that you have already done thorough market research, and this price is obviously not fair or acceptable by any means, indicating the need for a more equitable proposal.

Not entertaining far-below-asking price offers.  

This response to the offers is significantly below the asking price, which you don’t want to entertain, while still emphasizing the need for offers that align more closely with your expectations.

Huh, even the cost of materials wouldn’t be covered.

The offered price is so low to you that it wouldn’t even cover the cost of materials, highlighting the unreasonableness of the proposal and the need for a more substantial offer, as per your views and needs.

Thanks, but I’ll pass.

You are politely declining the offer while indicating that it does not meet your expectations and suggesting that you are not interested in pursuing further negotiations with them based on the current offer.

Sorry, too low.

This is a straightforward communication regarding an offer whose price is too low and does not meet your expectations. We aim to reach a mutually agreeable price.

Window shopper, or serious buyer?

You are questioning the seriousness of the buyer’s interest, suggesting that their offer is so low that they may be merely browsing rather than genuinely considering making a purchase.

No problem, The right buyer will find it.

This is a gracious acknowledgement of the offer, indicating your confidence that a suitable buyer will eventually come along because the current offer does not meet your expectations.


Low ball offers when selling your house can turn your head if you don’t know how to deal with that properly.

But if you focus on giving a funny response as your best comeback for such low-ball offers, you can surely handle them with care and humour.

Always maintain a positive vibe and tonality rather than making them angry, leading to breaking that deal.

About the author
Lucas Mateo
Hi, I'm Lucas Mateo having 10+ years of teaching English, but textbooks lack the real-life sparkle. So, I created Tipsy Tiaras! Here, ditch the dull and learn to talk like a pro with expert tips & confidence-boosting fun!

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