25+ How to Respond to a Pity Invite

So, you got a last-minute invite, and it makes you feel bad, right? We get it!

But, responding to a Pity Invite without being rude is not easy.

If you think so, check out these 25 ways to gracefully and effectively respond to a Pity Invite or decline it.

25+ Responses to A Pity Invite

  1. Thanks for thinking of me, but I’ve got other plans.
  2. I’d love to come, but I just negotiated a peace treaty with my cat, sorry!
  3. Thanks for the invitation, but I’ll have to decline respectfully.
  4. Thanks, but I’ve got some stuff to take care of.
  5. Sorry, can’t make it, but thanks for asking!
  6. Thank you for inviting me, Take Care!
  7. Thank you, but I have a policy of declining invitations, which I suspect is out of pity.
  8. Thanks for inviting me to the party, but can we try a new restaurant instead?
  9. I appreciate the invite, but we’ll watch out for Charlie’s school meeting.
  10. I might not be able to join, but let me know if I can help in another way.
  11. Thanks but Sorry, If you’re open to hanging out another time, let’s do it.
  12. I can’t make it this time, but I would love to hear how it goes!
  13. I appreciate the invite, but I will opt for solo downtime instead.
  14. Wow, thanks for the invite! Is this a pity invite, or are you genuinely excited to see me?
  15. My social battery is running low. Maybe I’ll see you next time!
  16. Thanks for the invite! Unfortunately, I’m not in the mood for dance parties.
  17. TYSM, but I’m not comfortable attending events like this right now.
  18. I am missing out this time but sending all my love.
  19. I won’t be there, but I can offer support or help.
  20. TY, But right now, I’m finding the perfect Netflix show. Maybe next time?
  21. Unfortunately, my suit & tie is at the dry cleaners; you guys can chill; thank you!
  22. Thanks for the invite! But, I booked the most efficient way to do laundry.
  23. I’d love to join, but I’m not free this weekend. How about next Friday?
  24. My introvert flag is flying high right now for social interactions.
  25. I appreciate the invitation, but I need some space for my well-being.

Also See: Professional & Funny Ways To Say “I’m Down”

How to Respond to a Pity Invite – 25 Ways

Well, there are many ways. 

You should express gratitude for the invite and politely decline while thanking them for considering you.

There could be an alternative instead for a future meetup to maintain a positive tone without feeling guilty. 

Please keep the response respectful and kind and try to end it on a warm note to leave the door open for the future.

Should I Accept A Pity Invite?

Short Answer: it depends.

Accepting or not accepting a “pity invite” depends on your feelings and relationship with the person.

If attending the event would bring you joy or benefit you in any way, you can accept it even if it feels like pity.

 if you genuinely want to spend time with the person or are interested in the event.

Otherwise, no!

How Do You Respond To An Invite

You can reply to a pity invite in many different and countless ways, but here you go with the 25 best responses:

Thanks for considering me, but I’ve already got plans lined up.

A friendly response suggesting you’re busy & not making excuses but don’t want to share more details with them.

As much as I’d enjoy it, I’m in a deal with my cat, apologies!

You are declining the invite with humor and suggesting you prioritize staying home with your cat. It can be a joke, too, but it works well with someone you know.

I appreciate the offer, but I’ll have to pass this time respectfully.

It is polite to decline a pity invite, acknowledge the invitation, show appreciation, and firmly decline the invitation for a balance between being friendly and setting a clear boundary.

Thanks for the party invite, but how about trying a different restaurant instead?

You are thanking them for the invite but offering another way to spend time together, suggesting you’re open to socializing but not at the current party.

I appreciate the invite, but we’ve got to attend Charlie’s school meeting.

This response acknowledges the invite, politely explains why you can’t attend due to your son Charlie’s school meeting and clarifies without going into unnecessary detail.

I might not join, but I’m here to support you in any other way.

You politely express your uncertainty about attending while offering alternative ways to help even if you can’t be there in person.

I can’t make it this time, but I’d love to hear all about it later!

You are declining the pity invitation while telling them about your unavailability at this time, but also showing interest in what happens at the event.

I appreciate it, but I’m opting for some solo relaxation time.

You have politely declined the invitation while prioritizing self-care by opting for solo relaxation.

My social tank is running low. Catch you next time!

You are declining the invitation while hinting at needing a break from socializing because you are drained from social interaction but showing positive interest in the future.

I appreciate it, but I’m not ready for a lively party.

You are politely declining a pity invitation while explaining your current feelings, which explains your lack of energy for a high-energy event like this one.

Thanks, but I’m not comfortable with gatherings like this.

You acknowledge the invitation, as usual, then politely decline it while setting a clear boundary and explaining your hesitation or prioritizing your comfort zone rather than attending social gatherings.

Thanks, but I’m currently Netflix-hunting. Maybe next time?

You are using a bit of humor to explain your unavailability while referencing Netflix since you love it and want to spend time here, instead of being in the event and suggesting potential future plans.

Unfortunately, my suit & tie are out of commission. Have a blast though!

You are again using light but a funny reason for clothes not being available for not attending a formal event, but still giving positive wishes for them and everybody at the party.

Thanks for the invite! But I’m knee-deep in laundry duty.

This response declines the pity invite humorously by mentioning being busy with laundry duty to avoid any discomfort with declining the invitation outright and it also adds a casual tone.

Love to join, but not free this weekend. How about next Friday?

You are willing to join, express your intention, and clarify your schedule conflict. Rather, you are proactively suggesting a specific time of your choice to reschedule.

Feeling like a flag-waving introvert today, I need some solo time.

This response humorously declines the pity invite by sharing that you are an introvert to lighten the mood positively, lightly, and rightfully.

I appreciate it, but I need some space for my well-being.

You prioritize your well-being by telling them about your need for personal space, setting boundaries, and appreciating the invitation but respectfully declining it for your self-care and mental health.

How To Decline A Pity Invite

If you don’t want to accept the invitation you just got, be polite and respectful in your response to decline it.

First, appreciate them inviting you and politely explain why you can’t attend, then end kindly.

These few responses will help you decline a pity invite in a better way!

Thank you for thinking of me. Take care!

It is an extremely straightforward reply to a pity invitation. If you have a clear idea and intention behind it, this response is conveying a simple answer to them that you already know the context but still wish them well,

Thank you, but I have a personal rule about turning down pity invites.

You directly address the possibility of a pity invite and explain your reason for declining while possibly hinting at the invitation’s genuineness.

Thanks for the invite! Is this a pity invite or genuine excitement to see me?

When there is any possibility of a pity intention in an invite, you can use this reply to keep things light. You acknowledge the invitation and show appreciation but ask about a doubt of the invite’s sincerity.

Thanks, but I have some other things to run, Pardon Me. 

This response politely declines the invitation while briefly explaining your prior commitments, adding formality, and remaining polite.

Sorry, I can’t make it, but I appreciate the invitation!

This response is a classic and effective way to decline a pity invite: politely apologize and do not give a clear or concise explanation.

Sorry to miss out. I am sending my best wishes!

You are declining the invitation while acknowledging your absence, expressing regrets, and delivering positive vibes to them after all these things.

I won’t be there, but I am still here to lend support or assistance.

You are clearly telling them about your unavailability while clarifying your willingness to help despite not being physically present or open to ways to contribute remotely just for formality.

Thanks, but count me in if you’re up for it again!

You tell them you won’t be there but are still open to joining the event on another day or time.


Responding to a pity invite at the last minute when you feel the invitation is out of sympathy can be tricky.

Since you are still unsure about their intention, you should never use harsh words.

So, how to say no to an invite? Reply to a pity invite text gracefully and respectfully as in these examples.

So, use these responses and your creativity to properly reply to any pity that invites you to get in your life.

About the author
Lucas Mateo
Hi, I'm Lucas Mateo having 10+ years of teaching English, but textbooks lack the real-life sparkle. So, I created Tipsy Tiaras! Here, ditch the dull and learn to talk like a pro with expert tips & confidence-boosting fun!

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